Day 11: Relax, Relate,Release...

Just thought I'd post a midday message since it's the weekend.

I was finally able to get that massage I'd been waiting on and boy oh boy was it nice. I must have had some kinks in there because she was all into my back but I feel great right now. It's amazing the smallest of movements feel so awesome. Head to toe, I was in total bliss. I'm going to have to make this a regular thing. *snicker*

I thought since I'd done such a great job yesterday without the patch that I wouldn't need it this morning. Well after my massage the dryness kicked in to overdrive. I used the drops that the eye doctor gave me but they didn't help. I used my normal drops, still no good. I started out on a journey around the city but that ended quickly. I'm not sure if the massage made me that relaxed but I was straining to keep my eyes open. I came in and hit the sack. I don't know what the deal is. I'm sleeping through the night but I'm not sure I'm really getting a good nice of sleep.

Day 10: High Voltage

...ok maybe it wasn't a high voltage. Actually it was only a 9-Volts battery that the speech therapist used to stimulate my nerves today. This tool was apply multiple pulsating elector 'shocks' to my face. As you can see there was lots of gel used to do this. It was pretty cool. There were some points during this process that hurt slightly and others I could feel the nerves up into my scalp. When she went around my lips it almost hurt my teeth some. She said it gets the fillings but I don't have fillings in my front teeth, haha. As she did it she could see my face twitching. She also gave me a face massage which was really nice. I think this lasted for like 30 minutes. It may have been shorter than that, who knows. We went through the exercises and she could see a little dimple as I smiled. So whoot for progress. I'm enjoying the therapy so we'll see how I progress after next week's sessions.

 

After speech therapy I went onto the eye doctor's office... they actually check for bell's palsy. Not really sure how well, yes I am. Ok, so check it, first they checked my reading in both eyes (you know reading the letters on the walls). They checked the prescription in my glasses which is "very low", then the doctor came in and put them really bright light in my eyes. REALLY BRIGHT! Then they dilated my eyes. I don't think I've ever had them dilated before. The doctor then came back and shined another really bright light in my eyes. She didn't find anything related to the bells palsy and said she thinks I'll have a good recovery (since she thinks I'm doing so well already). Now, I don't know about you but I see this every day and I am not really seeing where she can say, "you're doing so well! But maybe it's just me. Anyhoo, so she did see a small scar on my eye so they had to take a picture of it. I thought the light she was shining in my eye earlier was bright. No sir. This one was eve brighter, NOT to mention she had to take a picture meaning, FLASH! Not only that she didn't get it the first time so had to take another one. Yeah uh no, lol. The 'scar' magnified on the screen it looks HUGE but that's magnified 1000x. So yeah, she gave me a solution to use four times a day and use the ointment at night. *check* I have a follow-up appointment in a couple months.

Boy oh boy, those dilated eyes are no joke. They did tell me I could drive, and that things closer would be more difficult to see. Ya think?! I drove with no problem. I worked for the rest of the day with those stylish shades on TRYING to see the PC. Didn't work out so well but I made it. I was told it could take up to six hours for them to return to normal and indeed the left side did. The right pupil is still slightly larger than the left, almost 10 hours later. Funny though, I haven't had to use any lubricant today, but my eye is watery

SP yeah, no video tonight either. I'm kinda tired. Some pain in my face but less than before. Massage in the morning. Speech therapy on Monday morning.

Day 9: The Beginning & The End

This one will be short and sweet, lol....

I slept a little better last night? I mentioned to you about the gauze thing last night didn't I? hmm maybe I didn't. So I was trying to find a way to make the eye bandage work. So, I located some gauze that I had here, folded a small piece of it under the bandage and tada, success! There is pressure on the eye which forces it to stay closed. I was able to get a deeper sleep and when I woke up during the night I couldn't open my eye.

Today wasn't a bad day. I actually felt less pain and actually have some progress in my face. Not much, so nothing really noticeable but when i smile there's a little more curve than there was yesterday. YAY! Overall there is still no movement though. There was still some burning today which really sucks because I'm using the lubricating eye drops. And yes I could wear the patch all day but I can't see. Like, I'm at work and need to be able to WORK, lol so I need both eyes. So why is it that my eye burns so much when I'm at work? It's not burning now. *things that make you go hmmm* The pain in my face doesn't hurt as much to touch which I'm really glad about. Aside from touching, it hurts to lay on that side too.

So today marks the last day of my prescriptions medication and the first day that I'm using the nutmeg ball. This was a suggestion from my daddy. I'm glad this thing has no taste. I might be able to keep this going for a while. I guess I'm supposed to keep moving it around eh?

You know how I was excited about my massage? Yeah, no! I had to reschedule it. And not only that if I want to get it sooner rather than later I have to settle for an hour (not 1:30). I guess I can do that. Anyhoo, I have my second appointment with the speech therapist on tomorrow morning. She's going to do the E-stim thing which is the 'shock' thing I think! (I'll let you know more about it tomorrow). I also have an appointment with an eye doctor tomorrow so we'll see what's going on with the peepers. Gosh, I need to do a tally of have much money I've spent in the last couple of weeks. GAH!

Ok, I'm wrapping this up early tonight (even though it's not really early). No video tonight, lol. Thank you to everyone that is praying for my speedy recovery and checking on me! Love yall!

Day 8: Did You See That?

That's right? There was a hint of movement today at the curve of my lip. I'm so excited about that. Now for a recap of the day.

Well, last night I actually turned it in sort of early, and I'm talking 9pm early. I guess you could say I was tired but waking up at 1am was not the business, lol, and then again and some time I'm not sure of because I refused to open my eyes. I used the ointment last night and put the bandage on for sleeping. It works but it doesn't. I need to get it just right for my eye to stay closed. If not, my eye will be opening up underneath it which pretty much defeats the purpose. I can't really lay on the right side of my face which sucks for sleeping.

Anyhoo, this morning I put the lubricant in my eye but still felt some burn so I wore the eye patch for the first hour. The burning continued which was different from other days. I applied a couple more drops, still not relief. Finally one of my coworkers said, "Just put the bandage on your eye... it's burning because you're cornea is taking a beating!" I want to be able to see after this, even if it is a little blurry right now. So that's what I did. I was rocking the bandage/patch today.

I'm not really feeling this pain in my face though. Not that I was totally in pain today, but I was not enjoying being at work. I felt like I needed to rest my eye from looking at the PC (yes I'm getting off here soon too). Even with the bandage on, that thing is still moving around. I also wanted to come home, pop a pill and relax my mind so I did just that. I was able to fix my ice pack and warm compress.

My MRI came back normal so that's a great thing. My speech is getting better. (yay for those of you that said you didn't notice a difference). My nutmeg ball never came but we've identified why, lol. I have a massage scheduled for tomorrow which I am most excited about. I'm not sure how much I'm going to want to sit with my face in that holster though ugh. I am scheduling an appointment with an eye doctor just in case. They say the blurriness is because of the Bells but sheesh. I don't like that. I feel like I'm straining to see things or having to focus in more.

Progress Report: There is some movement right under my eye (it jumps) and when i smile the curve of my lips actually moves a little. WHOOT! My eye is watering too, which I imagine is a good thing. Too bad my eye lid isn't closing to catch it to moisturize my eye ball, haha. If I strain I can actually get my eye to close more. Too bad I won't be doing that either. (ex-nay on the straining).

Ok, that's enough for tonight.

Day 7: NO TALKING!!!

I had to kind of put up a sign today that told everyone at the office that I wouldn't be talking much to do. It didn't work as much as I wanted but they were definitely aware that I was trying not to talk. Why? Because I was in P.A.I.N last night. If I could think of something for each of those letters I would. I took a pain pill and was still in pain. My face hurt to touch. Not a good feeling but I got on up and made it do what it do today.

Ooh, I picked up the patch and eye gook so hopefully I REALLY sleep tonight without my makeshift eye patch. I've really slacked off of the lubricant drops because I can't see, lol. Using both eyes is actually blurry now. It focuses in at some point but ready was kinda weird today too. hmmm, eye doctor in my future?

Lunch was good. I mean really good, lol. While there I figured I'd call the Speech Therapist to see what she thought about the pain. She said it may be the nerves that are trying to start working. I've attributed it to doing TOO much yesterday. I talked more yesterday that I had since last Wednesday. So who knows?! She also said there are some people that actually have to get pain pills for bell's palsy. I think I'll call the doctor. *dialing* Once I finally talked to them they told me to use a hot and cold compress, alternating, for an hour. *check*

I've done my exercises for the day. My speech is really good! I do however feel myself getting agitated when I'm talking to people for a long time. It's like smiling so much that my cheeks hurt. My left cheek gets tired. I'm tired of answering questions but people are still asking or wondering why I look sad "since you're always smiling!". One guy told me today that "you look fine, just looks like someone socked you in the face!" Really? Thanks!

Anyhoo, I finished my pack of steroids this morning. Funny, I try to smile and actually almost feel like I am, but I'm not rally. So yeah, I'm in chill mode and now it's time for dinner. Tomorrow is Wednesday, 7 days later. Still making it do what it do. Oh yeah Daddy, no nutmeg balls!

*No video log tonight*

Day 6: There's That Twitch Again...

...but this time it's a good thing. As I mentioned yesterday I could feel a slight twitch in my face and the speech therapist saw it as well. Ok, so here's a recap of this morning's doctor appointments with relation to BP. The first was just a quick Q & A of how things are going, any pains, how am I sleeping, etc. I told her about my makeshift eye solution for keeping my EYE closed at night as well as the blurriness that I'm experiencing. She told me to get another type of eye lubricant that will assist in keeping my eye closed at night and some type of patch to keep it closed. So I'll give that a whirl. I'll have to take a picture of what I've been doing. ha ha ha!!

On to speech therapy. Today was more of a consultation of sorts. The pathologist and I went through a series of questions as to what happened, what I've been experiencing etc. She took a few measurements to see the differences between each side of my face. With a relaxed face, my mouth has a 5 degree difference. When smiling there's a 30 degree difference. She also measured how wide my mouth opens on each side and how much my eye remains open. We then went over some exercises to see how much movement I have in my face. Some of them were hilarious because she's telling me to do or not do something She said my speech is almost perfect but she can tell the words/letters that I'm having trouble with. I have homework now. Twice a day I am to perform these exercises and word phrases. She did say not to overdo it with the exercises. So don't hold the positions but rather short repetitions of each. She did mention that my TMJ could act up. With some of the motions she could see the muscles in my face moving. YAY!

The pathologist and graduate assistant that I worked with today were really great. She was so excited to take pictures with my cell phone so that we can track the progress, visually LOL. (see below)

*side note* She said getting a massage is O.K. so I will definitely be scheduling that appointment.

So I go to work today "taking it easy" as the doctor said. and I realize I am talking waaaaaaaaay too much because my mouth is beyond dry. I feel a twinge of ache above my eye but that may be because I'm moving it around more that normal. Anyhoo, the day ended. I scheduled my massage so I'm ready for that. My jaws hurt though. I don't like that.

Day 5: Tiiiiiiiimbeeeer

Ever feel like you're falling? Yeah, neither have I until today. Today was actually a good day. I made a few runs this morning and surprisingly didn't really need to use the patch. I did wear it in and out of the store but outside of that I was pretty good with out it. I cut down on the lubricant because I'm not sure if it was making it harder for me to see. (you know, too lubed that it was blurry or something) Anyway, I'm not sure how much the steroids are really helping but I can actually feel something moving in my right cheek. That's a good thing right? Of course it is. There's still no movement, that I can see in the other parts of my face though. I don't even know what to do to raise just one eyebrow anymore, because when I think about it nothing happens.

So I went out this evening, to the movies. No burning, no neck pain; everything was all good. And then the movie ended and BAM it hit me, or better yet I kinda hit the wall. My balance was off. It was weird. I stumbled a couple times and finally got myself together by the time I was walking out of the movie. No worries, I had help, lol. My mama said she read about that somewhere that Bells Palsy can cause your equilibrium to be off. I learned something new today.

Anyhoo, I have my follow-up appointment and speech therapy session in the morning. See you then!

Day 4: It's The Weekend

So, I woke up wondering if this was a punishment of sorts. My mama told me I was vain, lol. I could argue all day about why I'm not, but I know it's a sin. I just love myself. I don't hold anyone's beauty to a higher standard than others which would in fact say I'm being vain. But truthfully I still feel the same way today! Is that wrong? I'm beautiful d@mnit! LOL

Anyway not that I had anything planned for the day, it's Saturday. There hasn't been any progress today. I've been doing my massages throughout the day but for the most part testing my ability to see, lol. I've not watched any TV today but I was doing some studying (GRE) and using the laptop. I mentioned the other day that my eyes don't work independently, and I meant it. Don't get me wrong, I can see out of both of them and can function but it's difficult. I'd have to really cover the eye for my left eye to kick into FULL MODE but even then it's still more of a strain. So I choose to keep both eyes open. I don't know which is worse? Even with my glasses on I am still having trouble really focusing in on things. Could it be that my right has too much lubricant in it? I think it's actually the better eye, lol, so I'm kinda screwed right now. No pun intended!

Anyhoo, I'm going to lay it down for the night. It's been fun keeping you all updated.